Time after time, you get confused about facts and fictions. You cannot distinguish between illusion and reality. You are haunted by the city, by the people, and by the world around.
You close your inner world and open your eyes. You see a feeding cup on your husband’s hand. No, no, you don’t want to drink milk, no milk, and no pills…
Suddenly, the world is reeling again; you see darkness everywhere.
You try to keep your sense intact. You strain and screw your eyes, you can see silhouettes.
Oh, that lanky boy, the crush you had on him. You remember him from your younger days when you could not pull yourself up to tell your tale. He is here to see you, to say l love you. You are still waiting for him to say I love you.
The boy had come to live with his aunt in your neighborhood. He had been living in the house next door for a while, but you did not notice him until you saw him in the store. You talked to his aunt. All the time he was looking at you, his shallow eyes scanning your face. He was so ordinary that you could not decide whether you liked or disliked. At the first meeting, how could you know his ordinariness will slowly become something special?
You open your eyes. There is a nurse preparing an injection. This injection intoxicates like a shot of tequila. You close your eyes, fill your lungs with air and wait for the sting.
Once the boy had lived in your heart, your mind. You exchanged skin and borrowed time. You shared four years, the best part of your life. Did you think so when you were with him? You cannot say now, it happened a long time ago. What issues you had, you can’t remember. You are losing your consciousness.
Involuntarily your eyes open, “Don’t be so anguished honey,” your husband says. Now, you remember, this is your man who always stands with you, always holding you into his heart